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How…
How do you get rid of a pain that is ever lasting?
A pain that hurts in a way that you have never hurt before? So deep and so enraged, that you don’t know what to do anymore. It’s not that you want to forget about it, but sometimes the thought just seems so much more appealing. Time heals everything, but how do you heal a wound so deep? Death of a loved one has struck me, and it has hit me hard. I never could imagine such pain could control you, it knows you. It can creep up at any minute, when you’re in class, when you’re sitting at work. It hits you and you can’t stop. Or when you’re in bed sound asleep and you wake up in a panic and tears because it won’t go away. The thoughts and memories of what i have witnessed don’t let me sleep sometimes. I wish I could erase everything, every minute of what I saw, what I felt when she passed away right in front of my eyes. I lost my breath, my throat closed up and i could no longer breathe, the pain in my chest. It’s hollow and non-existent in a physical way, but in an emotional way. how does that happen? how do you get that? Can I go to the doctor and say I have a big pain in my chest, but it doesn’t hurt? The thought of re-living that feeling makes it even worse. I have that fear of it coming back, the breathlessness, the panic.
How do you make it go away and how can you just sit here waiting to be erased when all you can think about is the pain?
Hold me in your arms
You build me up you raise me up
You kill me with your charms